Only in South Africa

I got an alarming little email today from our Durban office..about a nasty interloper in the lavie. Picture the scene. The story goes that one fairly nerdy policeman (he is an IT specialist with the police) named Sandile Msibi, went to the loo for his morning constitutional.  Lucky for him the loo lid was closed because as he opened it to pop his bottom on the seat, a bloody great snake said how's your father from inside the bowl.

Now the warning in this email, and I quote verbatim, says "it's not strange that snakes swim along the sewer lines and end up in the toilet bowl. It's by God's grace that his toilet pan was closed, otherwise God knows what would have befallen to them. And as he lifted the pan, he saw the snake and closed it right back (unlike those of us who enter the toilet backwards, taking it for granted the course is clear!!!)."

Now what is hilarious is this intrepid policeman then bellowed for help which came of course because he was in the police station...and the hapless snake was killed right there in the loo cubicle, so says the warning.

The email came with picture evidence of this sneaky snake which I just had to look at and realised that we South Africans do things properly. A job done by us is a job very well done. And clearly we don't like snakes. 

In my minds eye I can see the chaos that ensued when help arrived too. Uniformed officers racing round trying to find the appropriate tool for the job of eradicating the snake...without getting bitten. And a proper job was done.

Yes, same lavie, now minus the snake. Actually minus the lavie too. I love the four pound metal hammer and a coat hanger used for the job. And I can see the guys all with mental images of a snake attached to their privates smashing the lav repeatedly till the snake was well and truly done in.

All I can think is it was lucky Sandile Msibi was in close proximity to lav paper because I for one would have needed it instantaneously had this happened to me.

The email ends with this sage advice,
"Beware!!! Always make sure the pan is closed when you go to bed lest wild life gets into your bedrooms, always switch the light on when going into the loo, and lastly but not the least make sure there is nothing in the bowl before you use the toilet.". 

You have been duly cautioned.